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When the Reflection in the Window is Not Real Life

Being cheated on and left after the age of fifty, is kind of like when a bird flies into a window.

The bird is gliding along, thinking it is flying into the blue sky reflected by the pane of glass. Happily and freely going full speed, it suddenly slams into the glass and falls to the ground, stunned.

For more than a few moments, the bird will lay there, maybe as long as fifteen minutes, maybe even longer.

The cheated on spouse is like the bird. We are flying along, thinking we are seeing a clear blue sky ahead. But it is just our soon-to-be Ex’s, pretending to be a clear blue sky. Until “bam” reality slams us to the ground. We lay there in shock, checking ourselves, sometimes for months on end. What exactly has been injured we are not totally sure. Our ability to trust? Our fearless freedom dreams?

The shocked bird lays there. Then whatever is going on inside of its body somehow comes back to life. Slowly there is the flap of a wing.

We do this as well. Stillness and then, a rollover onto our feet and off of our backs. Sitting in the sun for a few more days and weeks and months we make sure both of our wings are okay. Nothing is broken and battered so much that we will not be able to take flight.

We move our wings up and down a few times and jump up and down to test our landing capabilities. And then when we are definitely sure that everything is recovered, we take off back into that blue sky.

And next time we are extra careful we are flying into an actual open sky and not a window. Before we know it, our feathers aren’t ruffled anymore. We open our wings and our unique voices emerge, filling our days with paths taking us to places we never could have imagined.

We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!

One Comment

  1. Eboni Eboni

    I can understand. Although, I’m only 32 I have been cheated on several times. My first experience with cheating I was in my late teens. We dated several years on and off. He claimed he loved me. My first love, and it hurt. My second experience was rather traumatizing. I got therapy after our break up. I was in college and at one point I thought we would marry. Well, long story short. We dated 3 years and he decided to have a one night stand. Slept with a random chick and got her pregnant. Wow! Guess how I found out……she messaged me on Facebook and told me! Aweful.

    I grew into a deep depression and it was a dark moment in my life. I sought therapy and stayed single for a year. I really learned to be by myself.

    Fast forward, I’m not sure if you believe in God. I wrote down exactly what I wanted from a mate, a relationship, a partner. I wrote it down specifically and prayed about it and let that hurt go. A year later, I met my husband. We are still happily married. We have been together 10 years now.

    Ms, I don’t know you, but I hope I shed some light for you. I don’t know how long it’s been since you’ve had your heart broken. If I can give any advice or any hope, trust God and write out exactly what you want. Your blogs are lovely. You seem to be a very nice woman.

    Glad to connect.
    Eboni Halvorson

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