When first left, all of those thoughts about betrayal, loss, and what the heck my future was going to be were at the forefront of my thinking life. That is completely normal. I was in the thick of adjusting to being left..
As years went by I, noticed that returning to those thoughts was getting to be a habit that was keeping me from moving forward. I learned how to pay what I came to call, “soft attention” to them. Paying soft attention helped me get on with my day.
I realized not every thought and feeling needed to be judged or solved. I learned to acknowledge them and let them go. This way I recognized the feelings that were still there without stopping my forward motion for that entire day.
Let’s give an example to illustrate what I mean. Maybe you feel something from your married days. Acknowledge that feeling, then let it go. Not to avoid feelings, but rather to take care not to get stuck there. In those memories and feelings long past.
The present moment, this day, is the one you are living. Make it a great one. Satisfy a need. Achieve a goal or create a new one for the future. For the tomorrow of your own making.
Of course, I never tell any woman what to do. There will be days when you need to look at that past event. Perhaps in the reliving, you will gain new insights about “back then” based on who you are now. That is a healthy part of looking back and moving on.
As we all re-enter the world after a protracted lockdown, just consider my idea. Acknowledge, release, and go out on a picnic with a friend. In some beautiful place. In the real world that is your world now.
We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!