1. This is a nightmare.
2. This had to happen.
3. I’m lonely, and I don’t even know why.
4. I have no idea what I’m going to do now.
5. I’m never getting over this.
6. Life as I knew it has changed forever.
7. That SOB really did a number on me.
8. He’s just as old as I am, what the?
9. I tried to make it work.
10. I don’t deserve this.
Can you guess which one is the lie?
Well, let’s go through them. “This is a nightmare.” It truly is. No woman wants to be treated and discarded so callously. “This had to happen.” It truly did. That house of yelling, or of stone-cold silence, or both had to come to a head. We could not have gone on living that way. “I’m lonely and don’t know why.” So true, and such a difficult feeling. It leaves you wondering if you’re going a little nuts. Loneliness is true but temporary, thank God. “I have no idea what I’m going to do now.” It’s true. There are no instant answers to the hundreds of problems that pop into your head.
“I’m never getting over this.” Here’s the LIE! And this is the thought that feels the truest. It hung around for a very, very, very long time. But I swear, it eventually walks out the door too. We all have our twisted path through the pain, but we do get over it. If being left is a recent occurrence, this one’s for you. Don’t believe this lie.
“Life as I know it has changed forever.” True. And hip-hip-hooray! You deserve happiness, affection and consideration. You matter! “That SOB really did a number on me.” True. That mask you wanted to keep seeing him through has to be pulled off. His actions help you see him for who he really is. Today. From now on. He’s gone and you are in recovery mode. Congrats.
“He’s just as old as I am, what the-?” Truer words were never spoken. The difference is, you can now embrace your age while he goes off denying it by supporting a 20-something who’s going to dump him soon. “I tried to make it work.” Oh, did you ever! But there are two people in a relationship and they both need to try. “I don’t deserve this.” Very true. Very painful. You have every right to feel this way. We all feel this way. But deserving or not, this is the situation we are in.
While you feel all of these truths and the emotions that accompany them, keep your eyes on the number 5 prize.
Every second farther away from your old life and all that you attached to it, will subside. You will heal. And one day you will awaken with a glow, a lightness, as if you are gliding through your life instead of trudging. Hold fast. Life is holding a new place for you to walk through, and when you do, think of the list you will write of new truths that abound in the life of a gallant gal like you!
We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!