One More Reason to Change

“Give me one more reason why I should never make a change.”  – George Ezra, “Budapest”

This song’s been on the radio a lot lately.  It’s grown on me.  Mostly the lyric above.  Because when I was in my tortured, unhappy relationship, I was stuck in that way of being.  Those old horrible labels I put on myself.  The Unappreciated Spouse, the Cast-Aside Lover, the Too Old to Start Over Woman.  Stuck in my own miserable web.

I realize now, how stifling that relationship I mourned over for so long actually was.  I was so unhappy, but I did nothing to change my circumstance.  So, when he walked out, there it was – The Big Life Moment.  For the first year or so, it was a smack in the face, with a sting that lasted and lasted.  I thought it would never end.

But time alone without that Cloud of Misery around allowed me to make some changes for the better.  Even though I fought it tooth and nail for some reason.

Little changes you can make.   Take an exercise class, Change!  Cut your hair into a New Style.  Change!  Paint your bedroom, Change! Rearrange furniture, Change!  Always have fresh flowers in your house, Change!  I did ALL of these things.

Can you see how little all of these things are?  Can you understand how happy they made me?  Can you see how stuck I was, how low my self esteem was after the betrayal, that I actually felt I DID NOT DESERVE THEM? AND THAT SEEMED LIKE A NORMAL FEELING?

Does any of this ring a bell with you?  Because, if it does, then please, take heed!  HE is no longer here, having an “opinion” on any little thing you choose to change.  U. R. Free!

So, do it!  Make a small change today.  Move a couch…buy blue mascara, wear a low-cut top for God’s sake!!!  Free yourself from yourself.  And all of those old, stupid, misconceptions that made you feel low all the time.  (Or perhaps still are)

Even if these things seem like a lot because you’ve been so down in the dumps, I urge you, as you are reading this to think of that One, Small, Thing, and go do it!  Now!  Get up and go do it.  Little things are big things.  Your heartache taught you that.  Use this once-sad knowledge to do something to make your heart glad.  Just a little lighter.  A tiny spring in  your step.  This day is your own now.  Care for yourself as you have never cared for yourself before.  So that this can become not just a “habit,” but a way of life.  A way of life that you deserve.

So light that beautiful candle someone gave you ten years ago that you thought was “too nice” to burn.  Put that silk scarf in your hair.  Wear those diamond earrings that are locked in  your jewelry box.  Enjoy what you have.  Embrace who you are.  Shine!

We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!