This Sunday is the day we honor Mothers. All the loving, nurturing things mothers do. And their myriad other qualities, like intuition, etc. And though many of us will be spending this Sunday honoring our Moms, it got me to thinking about how off balance nurturing can become. In my relationship with my Ex, I kept trying to apply some kind of maternal approach to keep the relationship together. And that was the exact wrong thing to do.
Thankfully, I’ve moved on from that. I had to. He walked out the door.
He didn’t want my nurturing anymore. In fact he resented any and all attempts. He didn’t need me. And I had to look at myself and realize that I needed Me! It took me forever to even start giving myself the love and kindness and attention that I deserved. No wonder I was miserable. What normal woman hasn’t had a mani-pedi in over fifteen years: Me. What woman hasn’t bought herself something new in forever? “You!” my mirror screamed.
How did I, a smart, savvy, once-self assured woman end up like this? Here’s the simple truth: He stopped caring about me. I stopped caring about me.
That’s bad. Really bad. And true. Really true. I mean, I guess it’s no surprise to us Leftat50’s that we lost ourselves trying to keep the relationship together. And if you have been left recently, I know you may be in the No Woman’s Land of Who Am I? Why should I care about myself if he doesn’t?
The answer is simple. Love yourself first and that will carry over into every single aspect of your life. Hey Skeptics, I know, I can’t explain to you how this is going to happen to you step-by-step. Life doesn’t come with a recipe card. It just happens. And when it does, we need to change our routines.
If you find yourself only doing for others this Sunday, I urge you to include some You time. Offer yourself the love you constantly are offering to others. Feel how good that feels. There is a saying that there’s nothing like a mother’s love. And there isn’t.
So take some time to Mother yourself.
We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!