The bed is supposed to be the place where you rejuvenate yourself. Where you share intimacies. A place of peaceful slumber. Where dreams are dreamed.😴
But when you’ve been cheated on and left, there are all kinds of negative meanings attached to the bed. When I was in my old house, in the bedroom I shared with my Ex, it was not a restful place to be.
“A bed is the only piece of furniture that has an intimate connection to your personal energy.”
It was where I sweated it out, looking at the clock.⏰Midnight.🕛Two-thirty a.m. Wondering if/when he was coming home. And then the garage door would open. And he’d sleep in the downstairs bedroom. Or it would never open and I’d will myself to sleep. Awful. Awful life.
Now I live in a new place. I have that same bed, but I’ve spruced it up with new sheets and a quilt and things I like to call “my Diane things.” And it suits me just fine. A bed is the only piece of furniture that has an intimate connection to your personal energy.
A few years ago, when I was still adjusting to my new life, I didn’t even notice but I rarely made my bed. It’s weird. When I was part of a couple, it seemed so important to make the bed. And then once there was no one around to see my bed, I just left it. I left it unmade. I didn’t care.
But then when I crawled into it again at night, it felt weird to me. Even if the sheets were newly washed, they felt dirty. I could not get comfortable. And I realized it was a reflection of me. Of my life. There is a derogatory expression for a person who no longer cares about their appearance. People say, “She looks like an unmade bed.” And looking back now, I know I did.
So I got back into the habit of making my bed every morning.Now, I’m no Martha Stewart. I am, truth be told, horrible at bed making. No hospital corners for this gal. No straightened sheets either. That huge mattress is too heavy for me to lift by myself. My pillows are so old they are unfluffable. I really should upgrade.
But I don’t. Because now I love my lived in bed. It’s been more than a few years since I considered it a “marital bed.” It’s now just mine. I try to keep it nice so I can try and get the eight hours and truly feel refreshed. And when I get up, I pull those covers over the bed and start my day. My new orderly day that starts with breakfast and ends with a little encouragement from my latest issue of “O”. And it’s nice. It’s nice because there’s no more drama. It’s nice because my bed no longer symbolizes heartache or rejection.
Does your bedroom feel like a place of comfort? Winter is a good time to try and get back to hibernation. Not just of sleep but for new life-ideas. I’m glad I got back to myself and no longer dread the night or feel lost in the morning.
I hope you are appreciating the bed you lay in. Cause the expression “You’ve made your bed, now lay in it,” doesn’t have to have a negative connotation. It can have a hopeful one. It can mean the end of restless nights and new days and the end of judging yourself. So I hope you make your bed today. And I hope you lie in it. You deserve a good night’s rest and a lovely day. No hospital corners required.🏥
We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!