So much has been in the news lately about the cheating website Ashley Madison that it seems just acceptable that there is a culture of cheating. This scandal has exposed that there is a cult of people, over forty million of them at last count, who were on this website presumably so they could cheat on their spouses. Many of them stupidly used their real names. Consequences, anyone?
Do you wonder who it was that hacked this site? Perhaps a disgruntled wife? Whoever it was, it’s left a lot of people with a lot of explaining to do.
When I first heard this story, as someone who had been cheated on myself, I was kind of smug about the news. They are getting their just deserts! Their deception has left them with a huge gaping hole of embarrassment to deal with. Even Noel Biderman, the creator of the site, who famously vowed HE would never cheat on his wife, was found to have cheated on his wife – twice.
Is this a cautionary tale? Is this a milestone for a woman like me who is so sick of the lies and sneakiness, and just plain creepy aspects to this entire idea? But am I right and forty million cheaters are wrong? I feel outnumbered. And sadly, in the wake of this scandal, I don’t feel anything will change. The psychology behind this entire idea, that the men pay five cents and the women pay nothing to communicate with the men, is indeed fascinating. But, I don’t care about any of that. I’m sitting here, wondering how the revelations of infidelity are ruining marriages as we speak. The men had to pay nineteen dollars to have their accounts deleted. What these men don’t realize is the pain they caused their spouse will never be deleted. The path of marriage distraction can’t be rebuilt now.
And what of the females listed on the site? It appears now that the women who signed up were the spouses of these men, who had signed up to check on their husbands. Not surprisingly, the female accounts were inactive for the most part, and it is being revealed that most of them were fake.
So there you have it. This is, in a way, an interesting social commentary on the psychology of cheaters. It is real. They are mostly men, and they don’t even care if everybody knows their real name. Forty million cases of poor judgement. What chance did I have?
There are those who still argue that cheating “saves” marriages. It will be interesting to see, in the wake of this scandal, if that “theory” holds true. I think not.
We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!