I’ve decided that I never need to speak to my Ex again – ever.
Because I don’t need to have a fake, “everyday” conversation while millions of ugly unsaid words hang in the air between us. (“Why’d you cheat, lie, leave me, refuse counseling, use ugly language towards me, only talk to me through third parties,” etc.) An everyday conversation with him would be a joke! I don’t need to partake in conversations that go like, “How’s your Mom? Have you seen so-and-so lately? How about that rock band we used to love.”, etc. I’d categorize those as a Useless Conversations. We’d had many of those during the final years of our relationship debacle. It wasn’t fun. It actually made me ill. Actually ill. Sound familiar?
“This is not a Bitter Ex-Wife proclamation. It’s an Empowered Woman proclamation.”
If so, than why would any of us have any need at all for “small talk”. We’ve been cheated on and Left at 50, so we’ve pretty much outgrown that little act of casual politeness we afford others. Old bosses, neighbors, grade school friends, etc.
I really, truly, could care less how he’s doing, what’s been going on, or if he’s traveled lately.
Making this decision empowers me to know that I won’t ever feel any need to so much as give him a nod if he should cross my new glorious Him-less path!
I do however, feel the need to clarify the tone of this pronouncement. This is not a Bitter Ex-Wife proclamation. It’s an Empowered Woman proclamation. One that I am proud to share with you. Because I have gotten there! I have arrived at an amazing place in my life journey, the one with my back turned to the past that I do not wish to change!
Because those first few years after the break-up of a long-term relationship can be tricky. I know parts of my brain, (the sleepy yet angry parts) kept insinuating that maybe, one day, it would all do a U-turn and I would return to being one-half of a relationship that was nurturing and soft. I am happy to say, I have recovered from that unrealistic expectation. And more importantly, I truly don’t want that to be my reality. So, if you are a fresh stepper onto the New Life path, don’t worry. You are going in the right direction!
For me that includes step after step away from the 24-year-relationship. As I continue to make my own trail, I truly see no need to ever speak to my Ex again – ever. It’s calming. It creates a stillness within. I realize this idea is not for everyone. God bless the “We are still good friends” Exes. That’s not my situation. And that’s just fine.
We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!