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All Those Things I Didn’t Say

“Don’t waste words on people who deserve your silence.  Sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is nothing at all”. – Mandy Hale

Right after you receive the Big News that he has indeed, been cheating on you and he is, indeed leaving you, you feel stung at first.  Kinda like someone punched you in the heart.  Then, you feel angry.  You want to scream at him, wring his neck, kick him, stuff like that.  But when it came my time, I said nothing.  Strangely said nothing.  Was I in shock? Relieved? Scared?  Blaming myself? Freaking out over my newly uncertain future?  Yes, yes, yes, yes and yes.

Others are shocked there was no screaming or throwing things.  Sometimes when feelings go deep there are no words.  So, he walked out the door that afternoon.  Right after the door closed on that big, silent house, there was a surreal moment.  The air was still, but everything had shifted.  Right then.  When the door shut.   It was a stunning moment of clarity and pain.  Of relief, joy, sadness and self loathing.  I’m sure you understand the Self Blame Game.  That’s why if this is your current situation, I’m telling you now, to Give Yourself A Break.  From the criticism that you are feeling.  Because even if he was the biggest, vilest cheater, who got fat and bald and mean and ugly and selfish and rude.  I guarantee you are still blaming yourself for this.  I don’t know why this happens.  It. Just. Does.

Step away from that now.  You’ve read this.  You know it’s happening.  But this mindset doesn’t have to be where you stay stuck forever.  It’s a process.  Keep breathing, keep resting, keep eating, keep communicating.  Keep living.  You get to do that now…

We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!

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