So, it’s midnight and there you are, lying in bed trying to sleep. But the thoughts in your head are keeping you awake. Tossing, turning, sweating. You are in that current that wants to drag you back to the Sea of Regret, The River of Lost Life Dreams, The Ocean of What the Hell Do I Do Now. When this happens, (And sometimes keeps happening for a long time) A) It is Normal. You are not some crazy person who is obsessing over your lost relationship. B) This is not a forever thing, it’s just a For Now Reviewing Your Life thing.
But, having said this, it’s still a habit you have to ween yourself from. How do you do that? Well, all of you reading this are bright women, and you may find your own ways, but if you want a suggestion, I find that what helps me when the Neurotic Swirl comes is to Future Journal. This means just write what you are planning to do in the next hour, or day or week, month or year. Set some goals. They can be crazy things you may never end up doing (Going to a Male Strip Club, Putting a lavender streak in your hair, Only wearing thong panties from now on, Learning French, etc.) or practical things, or whatever you can do in that moment to get your thoughts on a positive track. This might take some practice, but that’s okay. When I first starting doing it, I doodled a lot. Just doodles of whatever came to mind, doing violent things to the ex, walking towards a rainbow, or crazy abstract things that when I looked at them later, perfectly summed up what I was feeling. Or anything you come up with to take you out of your head – Angry Limericks, Crossword Puzzles with words that only apply to where you are at in life, whatever takes you out of that space. Read a book, listen to a relaxation CD, whatever. These are healthy things that will turn off your mind and help you get to sleep. After awhile, just KNOWING you have a way to stop the swirling thoughts will be a way to stop them, and your sleep will start to improve.
We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!