One of the most difficult decisions you will make is deciding that it’s time to walk away from your heartache. For aren’t we entitled to feel our feelings? Of course we are! But the big pile of dirt that remains from our Life Avalanche is blocking our future path. The one we deserve to have access to after all we’ve been through. Even when we think we are “settled in” to our New Lives, we are still bumping up against something. It’s the heartache.
There is a compromise to be made with our stubborn selves, the ladies who “can’t let it go.” If this is your story too, let me tell you something. It’s ok to need a hand.
Just because we did everything all by ourselves during the last years of our failing relationships, doesn’t mean we must go it alone now.
We’ve gone from “We” thinking to “Me” thinking. It’s time to pick a new “We.” Pick up the phone and call them. Whoever that may be for you. Don’t think you must instantly be the Heroine of your own story. When you are still in the avalanche, that’s not an option. And that’s okay. It’s all part of the life restart. That re-start will become a re-make when your energy is restored.
Do you feel wrung out? Of course you do. You’ve literally been through the wringer!
And you’ve probably been going through it for years. Feel what you feel. Then reach out to someone who can help you step away. Let the tears fall as you do so. I promise they will diminish.
You will see, as time passes, that the tears of sorrow become tears of cleansing, and then, one day you realize you have not cried at all. Maybe it won’t even hit you until the next day or week! It is this women’s truth that your healing will come without you realizing it.
There is love to be found in this world through your outstretched hand. Your freedom is within you.
We all go through major life transitions when relationships end… Through this website, I will share my thoughts as I walk the path of “New-Self” discovery. It doesn’t matter which side of 50 you are on. The real question is, Are you ready to live life? To forge a Path of Your Own Making (For a change!)? Then stop dwelling over the What-Might-Have-Beens and join me. Share your thoughts here, comment on mine, and let’s do this together!
Diane,
First and foremost, thank you.
This post hits home on so many levels for me. Some good. Some, not so much. After I left him a few years ago, the first step (and most critical to recovery) in the healing process had to encompass addressing ALL aspects of the human body’s reaction to severe, prolonged stress from things like verbal, physical and emotional abuse, manipulation attempts, repeated threats and stalking/harassment. All this while recovering from two back surgeries earlier that same year, and his gift of a “harassment induced” ass kicking 9 week long migraine/refractory headache. The positive in this is that I could begin to feel the strength growing within me. Strength born from a devastatingly painful past. Key word here is: PAST!
It was then that I found my voice. The voice I’d all but given up any hope in ever finding. From there, I’ve experienced a new trend of improved confidence, and I am LIVING, not just existing. It’s a fun and exciting new chapter for me spending time with my girls and granddaughter, and a great group of close friends. (A.K.A. support system)
But I digress.
Diane Burroughs, I really like the vibe of your blog, and your mission. All very relatable for what I suspect is a rather sizable demographic making their way on their personalized journeys during new and scary uncertain times. Thank you for providing this forum of acceptance, understanding, empathy, and common sense. I’d actually stumbled upon this site today, but I’ll be back!
My best goes out to my fellow uncertain travelers. Embark on that journey towards the new and endless possibilities that await your arrival.
Noreen,
I hope you are doing well in your New Life journey. Wishing you a wonderful year of healing and hope!
Diane